Jeremy Jarmon: Session Two

The very same day that I demanded Jeremy Jarmon be fined for his hit on Rodgers, it turns out that he was indeed fined.

"The NFL has fined Redskins defensive end Jeremy Jarmon $5,000 for a helmet to helmet hit on Green Bay quarterback Aaron Rodgers in last Sunday's game.

...

Jarmon was not flagged on the play, but a review showed that as Jarmon came down, his helmet made contact with Rodgers' and the league office felt a fine was in order."

Good. I am a seer.

Jeremy Jarmon, we are on to you

Did Jeremy Jarmon intentionally go helmet-to-helmet on Aaron Rodgers in OT of the Redskins/Pack game? Yes, I believe he did. I am making quite an accusation here, and I do believe he should be fined for this. I assume he makes the league minimum and because of this should be issued a citation for roughly $15,000. Or enough to cover the first few treatments of the Alzheimer's Disease that he'll develop when he reaches sixty-three years old due to being a young concussed NFL star.

Did Jeremy Jarmon intentionally go helmet-to-helmet on Aaron Rodgers in OT of the Redskins/Pack game? Yes, I believe he did. I am making quite an accusation here, and I do believe he should be fined for this. Rodgers will not make the case for himself, so I must carry the burden of this banner and tread onward in his stead. And now...

The Thesis: Jeremy Jarmon(DE, Washington Redskins) purposefully sought helmet-to-helmet contact with Aaron Rodgers in OT of the Redskins/Pack game.

Who knows what malice lurks in his heart, just waiting to be unleashed like a defense with eleven Claymakers.

The Evidence: Well, we don't exactly have evidence per say... unless you mean this highlight reel of him bludgeoning Rodgers right in the temple, using his own helmet as the weapon of choice. Behold!

Now, I understand if you don't feel the urging sensation to watch this entire clip, but take notice of the final few moments of the clip - 46 seconds and beyond. Screencaps forthcoming

SERIOUS UPDATE:

OK, here's some screencaps. Focus on Jarmon's helmet as he goes in for the kill.

Ball out

Rodgers can see the hit coming

Collision

Post collision. Take note of the angle of Jarmon's helmet as it is pointed towards Rodgers. This tells my brain and eyeballs that he tilted his neck forward in order to initiate the helmet contact.

Post-post collision. Just a really weird body-position that Jarmon is in. Considering he had his hands flailing in the air during the entire take-down, you would think he was trying to hold up and not hit Rodgers. Obviously, this was a distraction ploy to get the ref to look at something other than the helmets colliding.

Shot of Rodgers on the ground for added emotional reaction.

I think we've made our point here.

The Sunday Hour Before Kickoff Preview of Sunday

Oh yes. Could it truly be that time of the year? Truly, it could be. I am sitting here on this lovely ass-sunken couch, watching American football, eating pizza rolls and praying that Jay Cutler breaks his feeble diabetes-addled legs. I'm no surgeon, but I assume it makes your bones weak and thus much easier to explode on contact. Indeed, the Cutler jokes will continue. After being put on a long hiatus after the unfortunate outcome of the 2009 season - and because we rarely posted here in the offseason - the fury has returned. The year of 2010 will bring a whole new level of professionalism to this blog and its unmatched football analysis, which we bring to you without cost.

Consider: you are watching ESPN NFL Coutdown on Sunday morning just as you would on a normal football Sunday. Instead of being subject to an ever-growing semi-circle of football has-beens and unathletic journalists masquerading as football has-beens yapping your ears off on the tube, why not come to a calm, rational discussion of the day's events in football at a round-table session featuring such hallowed Football Practitioners as The Baron and yours truly.

NFL Countdown Opinoneers. These are your basic comments from the best and brightest in the football world, brought to you by ESPN:

Chris Berman - "WHAA!? Tommy, what do you think of that!?!"

Mike Ditka - "Keep everything the same. Changing anything is wrong. I like the Packers more than the Bears now."

Keyshawn Johson - "Yo dawg, I look good. USC, baby!"

Cris Carter - "These recievers ain't as good as you or me, Key. Right? Well they ain't as good as me.. I can still play! Come on, man!"

Tom Jackson - "Mmmmhmmm mmmmmmm hmmmmm mmhmmm MMMMMmmm mmm MMMMMMMMMM Oh yeah that's right Boom!"

This completes your basic round-table discussion on if your team has a chance to win on Sunday. So, in closing, I think this proves the basic premise that my crew and myself will bring home the bacon every Sunday. Support!

Packers 34

Philadelphia 17

Complete devastation

There is no way to coat the Packer loss in a sleak and shiny gloss of happy words and silverish linings. None. What happened today needs to be a rallying cry for the rest of this year - Nay, the rest of the decade. As if scoring 45 points on a team isn't humiliating enough, this defense needs to be humiliated publicly from within the organization - preferably by Aaron Rodgers himself. Oh, yes, I'm sure they already know how terribly they played and I'm sure they feel just awful about it, but this is par for the course as far as Packer defense is concerned. There was a moment on the sidelines after the defense let the Cardinals score a touchdown on their fifteenth straight possession and $21 million man Brandon Chillar walked by Rodgers and gave him a pat on the helmet as if to say, "You know, we're really sorry about being so bad and all, but you're going to have to win this game. I mean, just look at us!" I completely expected Rodgers to rip off his helmet and drop an F-bomb and a quick "SOMEONE MAKE A PLAY" quip right in Chillar's grill - thus spurring us on to victory. Alas, it was not so.

It must take one cool customer to not snap during that game and just tear into the defense with vulgarities and many harsh tones. Were I in the shoes of Rodgers, this is exactly what I would have done, because I wear my heart on my sleeve and I don't make apologies. Sorry. OK, so maybe Rodgers is smart for not calling anyone out, though I doubt he ever would. He's the man and nothing is going to change that.

I have always been one to blame referees on a whim, so this should come as no suprise to anyone who watches NFL games: refs are awful. They have not yet reached NBA level awful, though that will be difficult to accomplish because the NFL is not a sitcom complete with fixed outcomes and moments of family friendliness like the NBA is. Larry Fitzgerald was putting Woodson on his back all game long, Rodgers gets a direct helmet to the face, JMF gets shoved while on the ground after a play is over, Cullen Jenkins is punished for being held and pushed into Elijah Warner and the list of grievances goes on and on.

Last play of the game:



But it shouldn't have been a facemask penalty or anything.

Sour grapes? Of course it's sour grapes. I have a soul, do I not?

And if I have to see Jarrett Bush play one more down of defensive football for the Packers I will personally sabotage his food supply with hallucinogenic mushrooms and get him banned from the league. Don't make me do it Jarrett. For your own sake.

FURIOUS UPDATE: nfl.com has the facemask picture right on the front page. OPEN YOUR EYES

Rodgers and Woodson

Near the end of the Dallas game there was a moment in utter coolness that shattered all previous barriers before it. Nothing to come after it will ever reach the apex reached on the victorious and tear-filled evening. I speak, of course, of Aaron Rodgers' and Charles Woodson's Clint Eastwood-esque handshake at the end of the game.

Many waning moons I have searched for this picture. I finally had to ask the assistance of some football/internet nerds and this morning they came through for me, much to my own happiness.

Do you dare let your eyes watch History itself unfold?

The Epitome of the Epitomized

Aaron Rodgers is the best quarterback ever. There's nerd-stats to prove it.

Get the man an O-line and he'll be even bester.

The Saturday preview of Sunday

"Follow my lead."

"Hey, Tony, you blew the game just now."
*sniff* "Shut up, man!"

Once again, it has come time for some serious analysis by yours truly. The strong-willed Aaron Rodgers(see above) and his rugged band of league average teammates take on the weak, feeble-minded Tony Romo(also see above). Did you know his last name rhymes with homo? I mean for god's sake! You just never know who the NFL will let play in the league these days. On to the game.

The Packers need - NEED - this win. Bad. They need it so badly the players and head coach are calling it a must win:

Colledge: "Sunday is absolutely a huge game,"
Jennings: "Definitely got to have this game. Got to have it."
Driver: "Oh, of course, this is a must-win,"
McCarthy: "We really want to win the game this week,"

Now, McCarthy is a master of coach-speak, so I'll have to translate for you - as I am fluent. What he really said is, "If these guys don't win for me on Sunday I won't make the playoffs and they'll can my ass. We're really going to have to clean up our house this week." And blah blah blah and a couple references to "technique" and "commitment to the run". If he wants some extra motivation he can get faux-enraged by Patrick Crayton's little jab.

And lastly we will have Johnny Jolly summarize our pre-game coverage for you: "I mean, they big, we big. They got a nice line. We got a nice D-line, too."

Well done, Johnny. Packers need this game or else it's curtains for the rest of the season. Green Bay has the 5th ranked defense and 8th ranked offense and yet they are 4-4. That will end this week when our defensive line finally steps up and gets to Romo four times. Yes, four sacks of Romo. Sack of Romo could be the name of a very rare spice, indigenous only to Tomah, Winconsin - or it could be the name of a gay porn movie, of which he is likely to be the star. Please, Packers, let's put the gay porn star in his place - THE LOSS COLUMN.

Packers - 31
Girls - 20

I hate Jay Cutler

So I'm sure we've all heard the disgusting news of Jay Cutler being traded to Suck Town(Chicago, if you couldn't think of it). I hate Jay Cutler. He is Terrell Owens at quarterback. GREAT! I can't remember a QB who has whined this much besides Eli Manning - who I also hate.

God, I hate Cutler. He wasn't even in the North and I hated him. He wasn't even in the same Conference and I hated him. Now the heir-apparent of John Elway comes full circle to play for the freaking Bears. I still have nightmares about 1997. I CURSE JOHN ELWAY'S NAME LIKE THE PLAGUE. And now the man who claims he is better than Elway comes to my division. This is all like a sick joke. April Fools, right guys? Guys???!

Here's an exchange I and a few others had on a forum about this deal - QUOTED VERBATIM(names withheld)

-------

Good Poster 1: Remember, there is a reason he isn't in Denver anymore, and it's not because his name was floated in trade rumors.

Idiot Cutler Apologist 1: You're right. It's because Bowlen hired an arrogant rookie coach who is completely lacking in social skills and tact. Their offense was the only piece of the team that was working for fuck sake.

Jared K(that's me!): In other words, Cutler got his feelings hurt.

Idiot Cutler Apologist 1: (responding to my jab at Cutler) You are the franchise qb Denver has coveted since the retirement of Elway. Your owner has just proclaimed you to be "the man" on his team. Then you learn that your knuckle-headed new coach --- acting like a loose cannon --- is trying to work out a trade to have you dealt away. When called on it, McDouche denies he initiated any trade talks until he's forced to recant when several media sources prove otherwise. Speaking of immaturity, decide for yourself who is 32 and who is 25.

Jared K and similar posters in this thread bashing Cutler are ill-informed. I heard the same shit about Elway back in 1983. How did that work out?!

Now I have to sit back and watch while Cutler steers the Bears to several successful seasons.

Good Poster 1: But if he was a franchise quarterback without any baggage why would said coach be seeking a trade to begin with, and why is Cutler no longer in Denver?

There is a lot more to the story than an "arrogant rookie coach wanted to make a splash." Cutler has been rubbing people the wrong way since he arrived in Denver.

Jared K(Me again!): Aaron Rodgers has been through 10x as much scrutiny as that pussy Jay Cutler has. From the day he was drafted he was fed to the wolves.

For 4 years now Rodgers has had to deal with nothing but Favre this Favre that or "Will you ever be as good as Favre?" "How do you feel about Favre coming back?" "You know the fans really don't like you as much as Favre and never will, right?" 4 YEARS OF THAT. Rodgers did nothing except keep his mouth shut and wait for his time. He handled the pressure like a professional and not some crybaby kid. How do you think Rodgers felt when Favre came trumpeting back to Green bay like a king on his steed last year at training camp? Talk about the most awkward time I have ever seen in sports. He didn't like it, and he kept his mouth shut.

At the first sign of "there's a trouble brewin'!" Cutler tanks. He didn't even answer McDaniel's text message for Christ's sake! How much more pathetic can you get?

Rodgers already went through shit a lot worse than this and he proved a mental toughness and gained the respect of the players, media and fans. Cutler failed and has proven himself to be a diva who if he doesn't get his way will cry and pout until he does get his way. So don't give me that "ill-informed" bullshit because we've already been through it here.

Idiot Cutler Apologist 1: (responding to my post)I doubt a Packer fan is reading the Denver Post sports page every day like I am.


-------

DING DING DING!!! There you have it! I'm convinced! Culter is awesome! McDaniels is the worst person evarrrr! Notice how he completely ignores everything I said about what Rodgers had been through.

Cutler - You are now officially a FIB. Get used to the hate, Jay. We already hated you when you were in Denver.

Aaron Rodgers Vs Brett Favre

We've all known it since Rodgers was drafted: Favre hates Rodgers. And now we have undeniable, indisputable PROOF!

This is the clincher. The deal-sealer. The milk on top of my cereal. The beer filling my stein.

Behold the hatred!

Aaron Rodgers Interview

The great Aaron Rodgers was interviewed on the "Michael Irvin Show" a bit of a time ago. He made some very interesting comments on Brett Favre.



Favre has not talked to Rodgers in over a year. ONE YEAR!...

So let's see. Favre has time to talk to Mexico-loving Tony Romo about a hurt pinky, but doesn't have time to answer Rodger's phone calls over the course of a year.

"Where were you between March and June?"

I love Aaron Rodgers.