The dueling speeches amount to the most direct engagement so far between Obama and his conservative critics in the volatile argument over what tactics are justified in detaining and interrogating suspected enemy combatants.
I am thinking of a scenario where Barry sends out his bloodhound Joe Biden to wreak havoc on Dick Cheney's speech...
"... and that is why I believe the President is making this country less safe. Thank you all."
*barges in from back doors obnoxiously* "Hey Dicky! Why don't you shoot that microphone in the face! HA! Oh, I'm sorry buddy... am I interrupting something?"
*barges in from back doors obnoxiously* "Hey Dicky! Why don't you shoot that microphone in the face! HA! Oh, I'm sorry buddy... am I interrupting something?"
"Joe effing Biden. So President Prissy Pants sent his lapdog out to sabotage my conference, huh? Well you're too late. I just finished."
"Wait.. what? Damn! O-dog is gonna kill me! I knew I shouldn't have stopped at Kate's Barber, just your regular small town hair salon, and gotten a trim. Oh well, I look good. Right Dick?"
*YAWN* "It's been fun, Joe. I mean that. But, really, I must be going."
*YAWN* "It's been fun, Joe. I mean that. But, really, I must be going."
"Uh... No, wait! WAIT!" *talking to himself* "Idiot! Look what you've done! Barry's gonna get me good for this... I'll have to retreat to my secret bunker that I revealed the location of a few days ago. What am I doing here again?"
"You're talking out loud Joe, we can all hear you. Now, you tried to sabotage my speech, but you failed. Just like your boss is failing. Also, your mother hates you."
"Oooh... Why are you so mean, Dick? I mean, what have I ever done to you, except crashing your speech like this and calling you 'the most dangerous VP in history' during the debates last year."
"I suggest you leave now, Joe. For your own good."
"Hey, jerkface guy. I think I know what's good for me, here. And leaving is not it. Now if you've got somethin' to say let's hear it, Dick!"
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
*drops to ground and weeps uncontrollably* "You... are... the master."
"We're done here."
"You're talking out loud Joe, we can all hear you. Now, you tried to sabotage my speech, but you failed. Just like your boss is failing. Also, your mother hates you."
"Oooh... Why are you so mean, Dick? I mean, what have I ever done to you, except crashing your speech like this and calling you 'the most dangerous VP in history' during the debates last year."
"I suggest you leave now, Joe. For your own good."
"Hey, jerkface guy. I think I know what's good for me, here. And leaving is not it. Now if you've got somethin' to say let's hear it, Dick!"
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
*drops to ground and weeps uncontrollably* "You... are... the master."
"We're done here."
No comments:
Post a Comment