It is a Dark Day

-Do not fret my pets. The rage has not subsided. It has only been sidetracked by 70 hours of Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

-The Rockets decided to choose the exact day I start to pay attention to them to throw their precious little winning streak right into the urine-soaked toilet. How did that team even win 2 games straight? Let alone 22. I may not know anything about basketball, but I do know that Marcus -not Carl- will be the dominant NBA player in the Landry family. He wears goggles. Enough said.

-Axel Buescher has crushed billions of children's dreams throughout the world(including my own) with the harsh reality that you can only succeed in billiards if you try really hard-I mean cheat.

Shaq's Inaugural Night

Wow Shaq..nice work. You looked absolutely terrible last night..in fact..I don't think you could have played worse. Just from glancing at the TV every 20 minutes or so, I saw two of your outlet passes stolen and one time you had the ball stripped from your gigantic hands as you stood looking like an enormous ape asking for a foul. Here's to you Shaq..what a crappy night.