2010/02/22
Never Buy Walmart's name brand Chicken Patties
So by the majesty of my mother she of coarse bought the name brand Walmart Chicken patties. And don't get me wrong I love my food club products, like granola bars, waffles, heck I even love Orv's pizzas. But this cheap meat served to me for supper was just horrendous, I still get the shivers when I think about it. First off the patties were soggier than Rosie O'donnell running to the nearest dunkin donuts in a drenching rain storm and saturated in her own gross salty sweat. Anyways enough about that beast named rosie, and back to the gross food tho they are both closely tied together. So anyways I take a bite out of this chicken patty thinking it'd be alright, for the outside looked nice and crisp.
So I proceeded to the norm routine to douse the former chicken in a lovely flooding of ketchup, picked up the chicken with my fingers and took a bite. And by the grace of the great Micheal Jordan's dunks from the free throw line I was devastated how aweful the chicken patty was. First off there was no crispness to the concoction. Rather a layer of very dull seasoning and a big slobbery soggy chunk of fat in the middle, with no tenderness to it what so ever. The patty served better to be a chewing gum with all the fat inside of it rather than a tender healthy meal for a young man like me to enjoy and gain nutritional satisfaction from.
Then the warrior I am took another bite and managed to eat half of the patty but could take no more blows from that nemesis at supper and just threw it away, for I doubt even the rats and roaches of the sewers would find this product delightful. Finally after a batch of potato wedges, a handful of sliced apples, and a downing of apple juice the terrible taste of that supposed chicken was cleansed from my systematic taste buds, and the world was right once again.
But if you happen to like this terrible meal worth paying to not eat, or enjoy chewing on fat as bubble gum then you must find this attractive
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment